20 Things to make you Smile!
1.) I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
2.) Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.
3.) I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
4.) Don’t take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
5.) Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
6.) Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
7.) I’m not a complete idiot —Some parts are missing.
8.) Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
9.) The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
10.) Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
11.) Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
12.) Being “over the hill” is much better than being under it!
13.) Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
14.) Procrastinate Now!
15.) A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
16.) A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance
17.) Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
18.) They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
19.) A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
20.) I smile because I don’t know what the hell is going on.